‘One of my sisters said she hates birthdays/Christmas because she knows she's getting “arts and crafts” again’: Woman finds out her family hates the crafty presents she has given for years

Author image for Olivia Arocena
Olivia Arocena • Writer and Editor
Nov 12, 2026 6:00 PM EST

When your gift is a little cringe (Consider this piece preparation for the holiday season)

It happened to most of us at one point or another. It's your birthday or the holidays, and you receive a very thoughtful gift from a beloved family member or friend, but it's something you'd never wear or dare to display in your house.

You fake a smile and a sense of surprise, and you hug the person, saying how thankful you are. And it's true: you are thankful for the gesture and how much they thought of you, and if it's a crafty gift, you are thankful for the time and effort they poured into making a gift for you; it's just that the gift itself isn't something you'd particularly like.

Now that the holiday season is coming up, we have to remember what gifting means and try to step away from our egos and understand that the important part is the act of gifting, not the gift itself.

That said, we could consider the other person's taste to the best of our ability before making a gift. Our brand-obsessed aunt is probably not going to love a crafty gift, and to insist on gifting what we like instead of what the other person likes is as egotistical as getting offended because the other person didn't give you what you wished for.

There is a normal and expected amount of hypocrisy around gift-giving and receiving; we shouldn't be offended by that. It's just that it's horrible to find out. I suggest we try to normalize it.

This year, when Christmas is here, we can focus more on people's intentions and less on how much our gift cost or whether we love it or not, and also, why not? Try to be better gifters. It works both ways.

Ultimately, the best gifts aren't necessarily the most expensive, but those that are really based on the other person's taste and personality. So while you have time (we still have like two more months to go), try to listen to what your family members like and dislike, and use it for inspiration for the holiday season.

Honestly, it's much better to get a six-pack of your favourite drink than to receive a really expensive gift you don't like at all.

That said, if you get an ugly gift, please do the world a favour and don't go complaining.

Advertisement
  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10676186112
    via Kira auf der Heide

    The arts and crafts gift.


    Scene shown is a visual representation.

  • 02

    AIO - Just found out how my family really feels about my handmade gifts and considering distancing/cutting contact

    I'm (29f) a crafter and have almost every hobby. My mains are sewing, knitting and crochet but I also do pottery, embroidery, soapmaking and baking (eg. making my own bread). I'm a data
    via distressknitter4567
  • 03
    analyst and I work from home, so my downtime is spent on some kind of project. I love my life and my hobbies are really important to me and something I'm proud of. I make 90% of
    via distressknitter4567
  • 04
    birthday/Christmas gifts myself. If someone asks for something specific I'll buy it for them, but otherwise they're handmade. It's usually socks or homewares, sometimes sweaters or blankets if have the time, or hampers
    via distressknitter4567
  • 05
    with things I've baked myself. I'm never sloppy with it, I'm definitely not a professional but everything is well made. I found out that my family was talking behind my back about how much
    via distressknitter4567
  • 06
    they hate my gifts and wish I would get them something normal. One of my sisters said she hates birthdays/Christmas because she knows she's getting 'arts and crafts' again. I was REALLY upset and when I confronted
    via distressknitter4567
  • 07
    them they said I need to grow up and get things that people actually want instead of wasting my time. I've had a difficult relationship with my family and tried to keep the
    via distressknitter4567
  • 08
    Cheezburger Image 10676186368
    via Imani

    The woman making a gift.

    Representative only.

  • 09
    peace, but I'm genuinely considering going low contact over this. I would've stopped years ago because I know some people don't like handmade gifts, but they never said anything and it hurts that I HAVE been
    via distressknitter4567
  • 10
    wasting my time. IDK if it's unreasonable for me to be offended or if I should just learn from this and move on.
    via distressknitter4567
  • 11
    TL;DR - Found out my family secretly hates my handmade gifts and not sure how much I want them in my life anymore.
    via distressknitter4567
  • 12
    MimZWay There is no polite way to tell someone you don't like their homemade gifts. I have a friend who always crochets place mats. I don't use placemats. I'm not a fan of crochet. I never told my friend I wasn't going to use
    via distressknitter4567
  • 13
    her gifts. But I always felt badly she spent time, energy and expense on something I wasn't going to use. I'd just stop making them gifts. Making fun of you behind your back was mean.
    via distressknitter4567
  • 14
    Long-Trainer-816 Talking about you behind your back wasn't kind- but ultimately a thoughtful gift is one that considers what someone wants or needs, not what you enjoy making.
    via distressknitter4567
  • 15
    If a family member of yours loved gardening and you didn't have a yard or a green thumb, and every holiday and birthday they got you plant cuttings or compost, no matter how high quality or exotic, you might not love those gifts either. Especially if you
    via distressknitter4567
  • 16
    spent time and money buying something from their wish list or asking what they wanted, and they didn't make an effort to notice you don't like gardening. They were cruel in gossiping, you were a bit naive in your gift giving.
    via distressknitter4567
  • 17
    Cheezburger Image 10676186880
    via Cary Bates

    Detail of a thoughtful gift.

    Stock photography for depiction only.

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

relationship advice family drama family feud relationships family toxic relationship relationship drama
Scroll Down For The Next Article